


let me love u (Skam ~ Evak)

by larrys_princess



Category: SKAM (TV)
Genre: Awkward Conversations, Awkward Sexual Situations, Awkwardness, Bipolar Disorder, Dirty Talk, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Gay, Love, M/M, Making Out, Mental Health Issues, Sex, Smut, Underage Kissing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-06
Updated: 2016-12-06
Packaged: 2018-09-06 23:55:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,744
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8774803
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/larrys_princess/pseuds/larrys_princess
Summary: in which Even wants to love Isak, but Isak doesn't think Evan is capable of loving him. takes place after season 3 episode 8





	

Hi, guys.

I am completely obsessed with Skam even though I am not even norwegian. That tv show inspired me to learn the language. Omg I am so weird lmao.

Btw I don't have any experience with bipolar disorder, so I just researched a lot to be able to describe Even's emotions. I'm sorry if I'm wrong at some point. 

Enjoy:)

___

There was a knock on the door of my apartment. Who could it possibly be? Maybe just Noora or Eskild? However they left about 30 minutes ago. I put my laptop away and walk slowly towards the door. Since Sonja told me that Even is bipolar and would never love me back, I feel like shit. I haven't gone outside for a week; I just spent all the time in my bed, thinking about Even and me in an alternative universe. We would be laying in my bed, joking around and even though his jokes would be terribly bad it would make me laugh. To shut him up I would kiss him. I can't think straight anymore, can't sleep, can't eat. I thought of all those movies I have seen; it is not one big cliché. Apparently I was wrong. Another knock interrupts my thoughts. 

As my shaky fingers clutch the door handle I'm not sure, if I really want to see who is behind it or rather if someone wants to see me. I mean I look like a mess with dark circles around my eyes reminding me I haven't slept in days. Furthermore I am wearing boxers from probably three days ago. When I finally force myself to open the door, I am looking straight at the boy with the blue eyes who turned my world upside down. There he is, crying at my doorstep.

I freeze, not sure what to do and especially not what to say.

"Hey", his voice cracks.

Instead of answering him I wait for him to say something else, to explain himself. Why hasn't he told me that he is manic?

"I", he takes a deep breath. "I ... I like you a lot. I have never felt something similar to what I feel when I am with you before. I can't tell you if it is love or not but-" Suddenly he looks up, straight into my eyes. "...but I need you."

I can't help it. My body is longing for his touch. Without a word I wrap my arms around his neck pulling him as close as I can. I couldn't survive losing him. Not again. I brush his hair out of his face as he presses himself carefully against me probably being afraid of upsetting me. His lips are barely touching mine. I lean into him starting to kiss him back and his hands are running slowly over my body. Our lips are moving in sync, but the kiss is getting more and more desperate. My hands slip under his shirt just to take it off. He bites my lip. I let out a noise that sounds like a moan and he uses this as an opportunity to deepen the kiss. Our tongues are fighting a battle no one seems to win. Usually, I would be embarrassed of feeling so horny; however I can feel that he is already turned on. He pushes me towards a wall shutting the door with his foot. He takes my hands and pins them above my head. Holy shit. This is hot. His lips move from my mouth down to my jaw and he then ends up sucking at my neck. "Fuck", when I groan loudly, he just chuckles.

"Wait, stop. You can't just keep play me like that. Not talking to me for a whole week, not answering my messages and believe me, I have sent you a lot, but then show up just to say something incredibly sweet, so you get me to make out with you. You have your girlfriend for that", I try to be rude, because I just want him to leave right now. Why do I always give in?

"I am sorry I wasn't feeling well", he whispers looking down to his shoes.

"You were what!? Seriously? That is a really bad excuse. I can't believe it. If you don't have anything else to say, you can as well just leave. There is the door", tears are now running down his cheeks again. And I feel sorry. Great.

"I fucked it up, okay? I am sorry. After you told me you've decided that you are happier avoiding people with mental illnesses, I thought you hated me. I mean, now that you know I am manic", his legs seem to give in within the next seconds, so I wrap my arm around his waist and hold him closely.

"I am sorry. I still don't know how to handle you and what does bipolar even mean? I have spent hours researching, but in the end I was more confused than before"

A little smile appears on his face after he sniffled. "You've done research on it?" His grin grows bigger. "For hours?"

I nod, making sure to get some space between us, because I don't trust him to just talk. More importantly, I definitely don't trust myself anywhere near him.

"Okay, so bipolar is having two totally different personalities. In one moment, you are this overwhelming happy person, but then in the next moment you get only little or no sleep at all, because it is just you and your thoughts at night. You are questioning everything. Even your existence and you feel nothing at all. You don't want to do anything. There is just emptiness and you can't even bring yourself to get out of the bed. I understand that no one wants to be in a relationship with someone who is, what word did you use, "insane"." It is not more than a whisper escaping his lips. "No one except Sonja. But now that I broke up with her I have nowhere to go and no one who truly cares about me."

"I am sorry for what I said about mentally ill people and my mom and I know I fucker up, but I still wanna be with you. Don't get me wrong I don't like your mental illness, but it is part of you and I accept it. There is just one condition."

He takes a step towards me, our bodies touching again. His eyes trail from my eyes down to my lips and back to my eyes again. There is nothing I would rather do than to kiss him. He leans into me, his lips just millimeters away from my ear. "And what is that?" his voice causes me to cringe.

"You have to tell me, when you don't feel well, okay. I was worried about you. I am scared what you could do to yourself."

"Okay", he susurrates.

My hands are exploring his body stopping at his belt. Shakily, I try to undo it, but my hands are not doing what I want them to do. He kisses me again. "Let me help you, babe"

His skinny jeans falls onto the floor. I am still standing there my back pressed against the wall when he drops on his knees. My heart is racing. He kisses my v-line, then his lips trail down until he pressed a kiss on my hard-on. I throw my head back not thinking about the wall behind me. "Ah, shit", I can't decide if I said it because it feels so fucking good or because my head hurts so much.

"Someone is needy", I can feel his hot breath through my boxers.

"Someone could shut up now!"

"No need to get grumpy just because I tried the dirty talk" he chuckles.

I just roll my eyes. "You suck at it!" 

"What do you want me to do then?" and suddenly I feel insecure about myself, about what to say.

"I...I don't know", I stutter, embarrassed of how turned on I am.

"Do you want me to tell you what I would like to do with you? Firstly, I would get rid of the unnecessary cloth, that's keeping us apart. Then I would look at you. Admire you. Touch you until you beg for my mouth around your d-"

"Hi, Isak. Noora forgot her ID and we wanted to go partying. So, open the fucking door." Eskild screams, banging his fist against the door for a few times. 

"Fuck. Fuck, where are my pants?" I am running through the apartment, but in one corner there was this stone in the hallway Noora wanted keep and take home and stupid me has to get stuck with my toe. "Fuck. Even, could you just hide somewhere? Please!"

"Found my keys. You are the laziest person I have ever m-" Eskild is standing in the doorway, frozen. "Holy shit" he says.

"What is wrong, Eskild. Do I have to look for my ID myself?" Noora appears next to Eskild. Both exchange a glance. Smirking they turn back to me. 

"Are you here by yourself or is there someone else?"

I can feel the heat rushing into my cheeks. "Yeah, nah it is just me here. By myself."

Eskild's grin gets even bigger. "So you decided to jerk off in the hallway instead of your room or the shower?" Noora laughs and moans "Oh, Even. Shit, you are so big." My face is probably bright red by now and it can't be more embarrassing. 

"Ah, hi guys.", Even wraps an arm around my waist. Okay I was wrong. That's worse. 

Noora waves with her ID and says "Okay, sorry. Just continue doing whatever you were doing." She casually walks out of the door and Eskild has already turned around as well, but yells. "Stay save, guys." And then he is gone and I can't help it but roll my eyes at his commment.

___

You have probably realized that english is not my mother tongue, in fact it is the third language I am learning atm. Therefor I suck at english and I am sorry for any mistakes.

I would love to get some feedback from you guys. 

Please leave a kundo and comment sth if you want to.

Let me know if you want me to continue writing the story. Or should it just be a oneshot.

Thanks for reading. 

Love you lotsxx and keep watching Skam :))


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